Imagine this … You’re seated in a diner, enjoying your meal, and what are you very likely to see??? A waitress going from table to table, offering coffee – to bring you a cup, or to refill your cup.
Am I right? (This is fairly stereotypical for me. If it’s not for you, just go with it, ok?)
Does every restaurant patron accept her offer?
Am I right? (This is fairly stereotypical for me. If it’s not for you, just go with it, ok?)
Does every restaurant patron accept her offer?
No.
Why not?
There could be any number of reasons:
They don’t drink coffee, for medical, religious or other reasons, or because they dislike it .
They’ve had enough coffee that day.
They might want some more in a little while, but not right now.
They can’t afford a cup of coffee.
They can afford a cup of coffee, and they choose not to purchase one at that time.
They like coffee, but they don’t care for that diner’s coffee.
They’ve never tasted coffee, and they don’t feel like trying it now.
And the list could go on … you get the idea.
If a restaurant patron does not accept the waitress’ offer, does that mean that they will never ever accept her offer down the road?
If a restaurant patron does not accept the waitress’ offer, does that mean that they will never ever accept her offer down the road?
Of course not. The condition for which her offer was rejected could change at any time, and then they may wish to accept her offer of coffee. It’s also true that they may, indeed, never ever (even on future diner visits) accept her offer.
When the waitress’ offer to bring a cup of coffee, or refill a cup of coffee, is declined, does the waitress get upset? Have her feelings hurt? Resign from her job? Quit offering coffee? Blame herself? Pout?
No!
Why not?!
Well, she understands that, whether or not her customers take her up on her offer for coffee, offering coffee is part of her job (being of service to her customers), and if it turns out that her customer would like some coffee, it will make them very happy, and they will be pleased with her service.
This is the main thing though: She also understands that the customer’s decision is not all about her. She shows up, as who she is in her position as server, and offers to serve her customers … and she understands and accepts that, at any time, a customer may not accept her offering of coffee. Period.
Now, I’ve been describing someone in a job (the waitress), but this could just as well pertain to how someone shows up in their life.
I’ve always had a natural bent toward health and wellness (physical, mental, emotional, relationship, and more recently, financial wellness), and I find myself showing up as someone who wishes to serve others along those lines, by listening, understanding, and offering solutions, if I can.
Hmmm … there’s that word, “offering”...
No!
Why not?!
Well, she understands that, whether or not her customers take her up on her offer for coffee, offering coffee is part of her job (being of service to her customers), and if it turns out that her customer would like some coffee, it will make them very happy, and they will be pleased with her service.
This is the main thing though: She also understands that the customer’s decision is not all about her. She shows up, as who she is in her position as server, and offers to serve her customers … and she understands and accepts that, at any time, a customer may not accept her offering of coffee. Period.
Now, I’ve been describing someone in a job (the waitress), but this could just as well pertain to how someone shows up in their life.
I’ve always had a natural bent toward health and wellness (physical, mental, emotional, relationship, and more recently, financial wellness), and I find myself showing up as someone who wishes to serve others along those lines, by listening, understanding, and offering solutions, if I can.
Hmmm … there’s that word, “offering”...
Do I get upset, have my feelings hurt, pout, when someone does not accept the solution I’ve offered?
If I’m being honest, yep, sometimes I do.
But you know what? That’s ok, because life is a journey, as they say, and I am getting better at understanding and accepting that it’s ok for me to show up as me, with my heart for helping others create a brighter future, and that others may still choose to decline what I’m offering.
It may not be the right offer for them. It may not be the right timing for them. They may not have confidence in me and/or the solution I’ve offered. They may not have the confidence in themselves to implement the solution.
That’s all ok. I’ll just keep showing up as me … offering my “coffee”.
And my "coffee" will be just the right offer for just the right person at just the right time. No accidents. Everything is working out just as it's supposed to.
So, tell me …
What kind of “coffee” do you offer?
What kind of “coffee” do you offer?
What is your "light" that you shine in someone else's spaces of darkness.
If you're not sure, trust me, it's worth finding out.
And then show up as you ... and offer ...
and trust that you will connect with those who need to receive your offer.
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